But the prospect of losing someone IS scary. And you should say that, too.
I used to know someone who would speak so romantically about death in battle, like it was a good thing. He was so obsessed with it. He had no idea that whenever he started talking about it, he'd terrify me. He thought he was doing me favors by fantasizing about a world where he'd died and I lived on without him, but he wasn't. It made it hard to enjoy the moment with him.
He only stopped when I told him how that made me feel. He never wanted to hurt me, he just got caught up in his own head.
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But the prospect of losing someone IS scary. And you should say that, too.
I used to know someone who would speak so romantically about death in battle, like it was a good thing. He was so obsessed with it. He had no idea that whenever he started talking about it, he'd terrify me. He thought he was doing me favors by fantasizing about a world where he'd died and I lived on without him, but he wasn't. It made it hard to enjoy the moment with him.
He only stopped when I told him how that made me feel. He never wanted to hurt me, he just got caught up in his own head.
Some people need the reminder.